Tuesday, June 19, 2012


I received my awesome edits for QUEST from Kate Evangelista. I'm so excited. I can't wait to get started. In a previous post I introduced my protagonist Malik, and his friends, Books and Raphael, but boys aren't the only ones who can go on an adventure. It’s actually my girls, Nevan and Dominique, who rescue the boys whenever they jump into something feet first without waiting to see if it’s quicksand.

When I started the story, I knew going in that at times the group would split up. I wanted a way to show the entire story, not just what Malik sees. My goal was to have Nevan have a unique voice that is so different from Malik that you know you're in her narrative point of view without having to look at the chapter title. I also wanted a character who would round out Malik, who got pretty obsessive in his desire to save his mother. There were times when he put this goal above his friends wellbeing.

Nevan models by example. She’s not flashy like Dominique. Or bold like Raphael. She’s not as intelligent as Books, but not many people are. But, she has common sense. She's also fierce and passionate underneath her shyness. She would die for her friends, but she’s smart enough to figure out a way to survive against crazy odds.

I’d like to introduce you to my second narrator, Nevan Callahan. The excerpt begins in Nevan's chapter after the kids come up with a plan to find the golden apple.

by Kiwi Sandro

Plans swirl around me like hair in a drain. It’s kind of cool to be included. And it felt nice to have them listen to me earlier since that doesn’t happen a lot. Most kids ignore me. The curse of being so gosh darn shy means I’m invisible. Grandma calls me a dandelion hidden in a patch of daisies. I think she only says it to make me feel special so I’ll stop crying over getting teased at school. She loves me. She couldn’t know that with my hair, being compared to a fluffy dandelion kind of hurts.

My head dips and white-gold bangs hide my eyes. I pretend to study the ants marching two by two across the floor, but really, I’m spying on my friends. Dominique’s doing that creepy, mind talk thingy with Books, and Malik’s watching her like she’s a bouquet of roses—beautiful, sweet smelling—the total opposite of a dandelion. The glow on his face makes my tummy burn. It’s so not fair. Why do I have to be a snot-making weed, waiting to be yanked out by the roots and thrown in the compost pile? Why can’t he see me as a flower?

Raphael stretches upright and bounces up and down on his toes. His cat-like green eyes flash. He’s up to something, and I don’t want any part of it. He’ll get us busted, because his plans always flop. He never thinks them all the way through. Like when he tried to rescue the stray dogs in the neighborhood. He totally should’ve realized the Brute would try to bite his face off.  I mean, duh!

He gives us a grin so full of wickedness that if he’s not careful, horns will sprout out of his forehead. “Eduardo saw me come in here. He’ll be waiting for us to bounce.”

“Seeing you this happy about Eduardo makes my spidey sense tingle. Have you given into the dark side of the force?” Malik asks, eyes narrowing as he rubs his hand across his forehead, smearing a streak of dirt across his cheek.

I dig into my pocket, pull out a bacterial hand wipe, and pass it to him. He stares at the little square for a minute like it’ll bite him then awkwardly takes it.

“Thanks, Nevan,” he says with a slight smile.

I ball my fingers into a fist, trying to hold onto the warmth of his fingers brushing against mine, and smile back.


  1. You're welcome! And true, a second POV can bring you places your main POV can't go, especially with the first person. *hugs*

  2. Love it, Angie! You pulled me in with just this little snippet.

  3. Thanks for stopping by Kate. Hug back.

    Ruth, thank you. It means a lot hearing that you like it. Especially since you write MG. I was really worried about this wip because it was my first foray into the MG world.


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